I'm not pregnant

It’s the main reason I haven’t posted. I haven’t been sure what to say. I’m disappointed but not devastated. I still believe with all my heart that it’s going to happen for me. But it’s hard. It’s really, really hard. When my temperature started dropping, I just kept praying that it would go up again – that is was an implantation dip. And when AF showed up, I spent hours reading posts on other websites about people who were actually pregnant even though all other signs were point to their not being with child. But I took the test. And I am not one of those people.

I want to end the year pregnant. And it can still happen. There’s still time. I am still perfectly convinced I will be pregnant before the end of the year. It’s cutting it close, but that doesn’t matter. Being pregnant on December 31, 2009 still counts! I can’t stop believing – that’s what faith is all about. I still have faith. And what a great story to tell when it happens. I pushed it to the very last day of the year, but Baby Lua showed up! That will mean I am hugely pregnant over the summer because my due date would be in late September. But I would love every minute of it.

With love to you Baby Lua – I just have to wait until you’re here. But I know you’re coming. I just know.