9 months

It's been hard to get up the energy to write in this blog, especially since I know no one is reading it. I am officially in my ninth month and Baby Lua will be full-term in a week. I am both excited and afraid. What expecting first-time mom isn't?! I can't wait to meet this little girl who has been squirming around every night for the past few months. On the other hand, I am so nervous about the huge responsibility that is on my shoulders. She's OUR daughter. We will have such a huge influence on who she becomes (hopefully)! That's so scary.

I've been reflecting a lot on my relationship with my mother. I love her dearly, but we just aren't really what I would call "friends". We get along just fine, but I really don't go to her for advice about anything and I certainly don't share most of my innermost thoughts. What if my relationship with Baby Lua is like that? I would feel so badly.

 I guess it doesn't make sense to worry about all of that right now. Right now, I should be focusing on wrapping up everything I need for work, so that I can take maternity leave in peace. I don't know how I am going to get through 12 weeks of not working and get up the energy to go back to work. But I guess we'll see...